Are you the parent of a child with autism that has been blamed for your child’s behavioral difficulties? Have you been told by special education personnel that your child’s learning disability, is your fault? This article will discuss a study of school psychologists about blame for children’s learning difficulties. And also, give you tips, on how to overcome the blame, placed by some disability educators.

Several years ago, I heard about a study where school psychologists were asked who they blamed, when a child had learning difficulties. The basic outcome of the study showed that 100% of the psychologists that were surveyed, placed the blame on the child or the parents. Not one school psychologist blamed the school district, teacher, inappropriate curriculum, lack of resources, or inadequate instruction, for children’s learning difficulties. Parents must overcome this blame, so that they can advocate for an appropriate education, for their child.

Tip 1: If a school person tells you that your child’s behavior, is because of something that is going on at home, stand up to them. Tell the person that you do not believe that this is true. If your child has autism, they may have a lot of behavioral difficulties due to their disability. Most families are not perfect, but most times do not “cause” a child’s behavioral difficulty; especially if the child’s behavioral difficulty is at school.

Tip 2: Try and figure out what your child is telling you by their behavior; perhaps the work is too hard, they are trying to avoid the work etc. Try and figure out the ABC’s of Behavior; A stands for antecedent (what was happening before the behavior), B stands for Behavior (what was the specific behavior), and C stands for the Consequence (what did the child get out of the behavior). By focusing on the behavior, and not the blame you will help your child.

Tip 3: If your child is struggling with academics due to a learning disability; make sure that they are receiving research based instruction, which is required by No Child Left Behind (NCLB). Children with learning disabilities need a reading program with five principles: Simultaneous multi sensory, systematic and cumulative, direct interaction, diagnostic teaching, and analytic instruction. Check out www.ortongillingham.com for more information.

Tip 4: Tell the special education person, that your child has the right to a free appropriate public education, and you will be holding them accountable for that. Be honest, and bring up any school related reasons that you believe your child is having academic difficulty. Many schools continue using outdated curriculums that do not work.

You can overcome the blame that some disability educators try and place on your or your child. Continue to focus on your child, and their needs, and this will help you overcome the blame. Your child is depending on you!

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Eunice Kennedy Shriver passed away on Tuesday August 11,2009. She was the founder of the Special Olympics and a lifetime advocate for people with intellectual disabilities. The Special Olympics is a movement of sports training and athletic competition for those that have intellectual disabilities. Shriver believed that people with intellectual disabilities deserve the same opportunities and experiences as others.

No matter what the disability, a person still has a talent, a skill, and a gift to give to the world when encouraged doing so. Using sports as a display of abilities brings about respect, acceptance and inclusion. Persons with disabilities benefit by seeing in themselves that they too have talents and it helps them to feel better about themselves. It also serves as a teaching tool to those who may have thought that disabled people were useless until they were afforded the opportunities to witness their grand performances.

The venue of sports has a way of bringing people together from all walks of life, nationalities, cultures, races and backgrounds. Along with the exercises, discipline and vigorous training that it takes to be athletically fit to play a specific sport; building character, strength, strong muscles, and team work.

No wonder the Bible is full of metaphors that compare the Christian life to that of an athlete. Since everyone seems to be able to relate to sports, God used these metaphors to help us understand the Christian life. No matter what physical or mental state we are in, we all have talents, skills, and gifts that have been given to us by God. But many times we are not encouraged to use them or to even find out what they are. Which is especially frustrating for those that have disabilities. Instead we must go after them, train, and master our skills like an athlete does for his specific sport. Athletes know what their talents and skills are and will train in that specific sport. Some people spend their time going after a talent that they do not have because they like it. Or because someone else has the talent that they want. But not athletes, they will not train in a sport that they do not have the talent for. They are content with their own God given abilities and not the abilities that someone else has. They know that they can find their significance and place in society by using their own God given talents and skills. Which is what Eunice Kennedy Shriver did to help the intellectually disabled find their significance through the Special Olympics.

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